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Discussion Starter #1
When Croquet Goes Bad

Reuters

CALGARY, Alberta (May 29) - Three men were sent to hospital after being hit with mallets and nine people were arrested following a vicious brawl between croquet and softball players in this western Canadian city.

One man was in a hospital trauma center with life-threatening head injuries following the melee at a Calgary, Alberta athletic field, police and paramedics said on Wednesday. Alcohol was said to be a factor.

"I didn't realize croquet was a contact sport," said Det. Dean Vegso of the Calgary police.

The incident began late Tuesday when a softball team, which had just wrapped up a game, and the croquet players, who had been using the same field, began hurling what police described as "childish" insults at each other.

"For whatever reason, the two groups got into a verbal argument, which turned into a fistfight, and then they began hitting each other with the wooden croquet mallets," Vegso said.

Police and ambulances soon arrived on the scene, and nine of the brawlers were arrested, he said.

Three of seven people who sustained injuries in the fracas were transported to hospital, paramedics said.

Reuters 13:38 05-29-02
 

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Milquetoasts eh!

And you-all thought we Canadians were wimps ... let this be a lesson - don't mess with the croquet players!

ps - the lawnbowlers can be a ***** when they're pissed off too!
 

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I bet they were former hockey players :chuckle: :chuckle:
 

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No worries with curlers

Andre,

Wacked out curlers are not much danger to anything but their own toes - unless they can get their hands on a catapult...
 

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Discussion Starter #6
Kush, you may want to expound on 'cricket' players.

They run around a lot, use a 4ísh foot wood strange bat and have 'test matches.' With scores of 400 something to whatever .... Can these fellows really be trusted after they've had a second single malt?:eek:
 

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chrome-magnon man
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speaking of single malt

I know this is way off topic but Fred brought it up (so I will blame this all on you Fred, which means I owe you one of the following when I come south to sample the Rogue):

I didn't know this but have been recently informed that CANADA makes one of the only single malts available outside Scotland. It is made in Cape Breton apparently and is wonderful stuff. Retails for something like $100 Canadian ($11.38 US but with the recent jump in value I think it is probably going for an even $12 US right now)

And yes Kush, I have some on order for the Martini Bar this fall...
 

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Discussion Starter #8
Dana, you can blame me for anything ..

if that's what it take to get you down here to sample the 'home waters!:D

fae
 

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Fred.

You are right, these Cricket guys wear white suits, use no gloves, play on a round field, "bowl" rather than pitch, wear "goalie pads" up to bat, stop for 4 o'clock tea and play for 2 or 3 days. These are scary dudes.

Now for possibly the ultimate in scary arcane sportsmen, I recently heard of what may be the most bizarre new sport - Spey-Duelling. Apparently the first recorded event occurred recently at some place called the Sandy River. Rumour has it that this new underground blood-sport occurs at something called "CLAVES" and was attended by maybe 200 crazed freaks in gortex and neoprene who watched "Fast Eddy" and "Dangerous Declan" duel it out. Authorities are reportedly forming task groups and dispatching undercover agents to infiltrate and eradicate this insidious sport before it sweeps the nation!
 

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Fast Eddie??

Jeez, Kush . . . now i'm ruined for the rest of the day!! :hehe:

I'm actually thinking this might be a way to resolve some of those on-the-water disputes.

Duels at 25 meters with 3/0 Alec Jackson Spey hooks?? Whoever Chickens first looses the run!:devil: :devil:

Like in the Ol West - the really hot Spey Duellers could snap the sombrero right off an Orvis-clad Pilgrim 100' away. :eek:

Definitely a way to spice up future Spey Claves. ;)

I'd better get back to work!

DS
 

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Cool, could we use weighted atlantic salmon doubles though ?

Back to work :whoa: :whoa:
 

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Discussion Starter #12 (Edited)
I'm beginning to doubt my wisdom at

starting this thread. :D But being how I did, and we flowed to single malts ... where do they come from and what "problems" may evolve due to over use? Malcom, we need your clinical opinion on the following.
fe

Scotland - Aliens' Favorite Holiday Destination
Mon Jun 24, 8:10 AM ET

LONDON (Reuters) - Want to see a flying saucer? Then come to Scotland.


The country -- better known as the home of legendary Loch Ness monster -- has the highest concentration of UFO sightings on the planet, according to figures released Monday.

Around 300 "Unidentified Flying Objects" are spotted in Scotland each year, the most per square kilometer and per head of population of anywhere in the world, figures compiled by Scotland's official tourist body found.

VisitScotland said 0.004 UFOs were spotted for every square kilometer of Scotland -- a rate four times as high as in France or Italy, this planet's other UFO hotspots. The 2,000 UFOs are spotted every year in the United States represent just 0.0002 sightings per square kilometer.

"This confirms that Scotland is the nearest thing there is to the Costa del Sol for aliens," a VisitScotland spokesman said, referring to the tourist mecca of southern Spain, which attracts tens of thousands of holidaymakers every year.

There was one UFO sighting per 17,000 inhabitants in Scotland compared to one per 61,200 in Canada, and one per 136,450 in the United States.

The Scots' favorite spot for extraterrestrial visitors is Bonnybridge, 50 km (30 miles) west of Edinburgh. One local councilor has even called for the town to be twinned with Roswell in New Mexico, the U.S. UFO capital.

"Traditionally Scotland has had a lot of odd incidents, right through history, from ghosts and poltergeists to supernatural beings and the Loch Ness monster. So, Scotland is well-known as a place where strange things happen, Ron Halliday, author of "UFO Scotland," said.

Others had a less dramatic explanation.

"UFOs tend to be attracted to regions that are fairly remote. Plus if you have a remote area, look out for airbases; Scotland is littered with them," Graham Birdsall, editor of UFO magazine, said. "In 90 percent of UFO reports a bit of diligent research will produce a simple explanation."

The figures' release coincided with what aficionados celebrate as International UFO day, the anniversary of June 24, 1947. On that date, a U.S. air force pilot claimed to have spotted nine mysterious disc-shaped objects over the Cascade Mountains in Washington, leading to the term "flying saucer."
 

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Indicators Anonymous
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I think this is where I come in...

...with my massive strike indicators and very very heavily weighted flys!!!!! :devil:

No one is capable of taking me down with the weapons I have at hand!! :razz:
 

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Hey Sparkey,

While at the ripe old age of 21 you might possess the fastest "gun" in the west, I doubt that there, ummmm, "skill" will serve you very well in a duel.


st:smokin:
 

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Makes you wonder what kind of fracas would ensue if you tried to hold a Spey Clave in the middle of a golf course. I’m not sure what would hurt more, the business end of a 3-iron or the butt end of a Sage 10160-3 with a 4-inch Hardy Perfect attached.
 

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Gordon, to answer your question. How would the golfer get close enough to hit you?

Seriously folks I have to woder about the soft ball players here. They get attacked by croquette mallets and forget they have bats? It sounds like one of those games I used to play in where the loser pays for the keg.
 
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